Electricity is actually made up of extremely tiny particles called electrons, that you cannot see with the naked eye unless you have been drinking.
Dave Barry, “The Taming of the Screw”
US columnist & humorist (1947 – )

Last night, I was “invited” over to a friend’s party. Being as I am to his particular brand of party, I was skeptical if it were going to be any different then the last few (the last year’s birthday, the Get Together and the lame “Sausage Fest” which I avoided going like the plague). So, I eventually arrived due to a bit of persuasion and the fact that he received Jägermeister as one of his gifts and was creating drinks with it. So, I arrived, amazed by the fact that the birthday boy, C______ kept such company, including a bunch of girls from his workplace that were so similar in every way; clothing, blonde hair, shoes and mannerisms. It was hard not to say that they could be related to each other other than mere friendship. Then there were the regulars of the show, namely; P__ the Drunkard, who apologized for the time when he was being an arse (I thought of him as stuck-up when I met him), G______ who I know from ages ago and his friend D_____ as well. Throughout the night, I stayed alive with the snack platters, avoiding things like the onion and cheese crisps because of the horrid after taste and also the sausages in a bun with onions in them. During the party, I downed two Jäger-bombs, Smirnoff and a little of Pure Blonde while trying to avoid downing another of the first few since it makes a bit of a mess. Next was a game of Pool; one I never got a hang of. I frequently told A___ to shut up since the other resident Asian in the house wouldn’t keep quiet and was, frankly, a distraction, quipping that the Pure Blonde tasted like liquid toast. I was laughing endlessly because of his sayings and the making of “toast jokes”, taking it a little literal as A Toast. T__ was also cracking jokes about no cigars. Better than average, I say.

  1. Sausage Fests are just so freaky. Like, you just walk in and want to run the opposite direction.

  2. Most of the time, it’s something just to attract the opposite sex out of hiding in the most disgusting way possible because these guys can’t get the hint that they want to do something more civilized.

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